Wednesday, July 29, 2009
I Wonder If I Ever Lived My Life For Me.
The town finally emerges from the cover of the clouds. Nothing on the previous photographs betrayed some signs that behind the clouds there are people going on with their own business of living. Perhaps there is no need to know. We look at the photographs and are amazed at nature's wonderful show. We just let the beauty fill up our senses. There are experiences that are meant to be enjoyed in silence. No questions asked.
There are times though that I ponder at my own life and wonder whether I have not strayed in the "no questions ask" zone more times than I should have been. I have relied so much on my senses to guide me in my life journey. Most of the things I did, I did it because I loved, because I cared and sometimes because I hated. I seldom let my reason come into play. I guess I believed in what one often reads in those Hallmark cards about needing no reason to love and letting love be the reason.
Sometimes, I ask myself whether I had been living my life for others or had I lived it for me. I got no clear answer. Perhaps, there is really no contradiction. Perhaps that is really how life ought to be lived. Maybe, it is only in living it for others that one could give meaning to his own life.
Whatever the answer, I still wished I had gotten myself interested in what lay hidden behind the clouds. I wished I had not only let myself just feel the beautiful "panoramas" that came along my life but also "think" them.
If had let reason play a more vital role in my decisions on what turns to take as I drove through life's highway, would my life had been more fulfilling? I do not know. Perhaps, there would have been less hurting and being hurt. Less "downs" and more "ups". Less distractions. More focus.But then again well thought off or not, life is unpredictable. I would just have to go ahead and live it the best way I know how.
(Note: These photos were taken with a 4MP camera and so are not as sharp as I wanted them to be. I have to get you better shots next time. Promise. :))